Party Hats, Candles & Cake

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22md Birthday. Last year.

 

I would skip the apology for the unnecessary absence and just get  into all the different things that kept me away. Expect some “front loading “.

I can’t remember how long ago ,but I guess it was sometime last week, I thought about all my birthdays from my first to last ear in Uni and how I celebrated every single one. LOL.

I remember not wanting to celebrate my 18th and how my parents insisted that i did considering that the previous year , the year between my 17th and 18th,  involved a whole lot of changes in my life. They felt i ought to have been more grateful for the gift of life.I had 2 surgeries , My graduation from secondary school , Success -for a change in my final math exam-and then admission into Uni. I was going to be “legal”so i just wanted something like a frame-able  graphically manipulated photo of me dressed like the lady Justice. This was underway but the graphic designer flopped. It would have been very significant as i was turning legal and I had just become a law student. Anyway, I went to church/ fellowship on campus wit my roomie as it was a Sunday, I took pictures , picked up my cake and headed to the lovely venue for lunch with a number of my friends and my parents.

Ever since that birthday, I  have not dropped the ‘party bug’ my parents passed on. I have celebrated every single year after that. It is best to make the best of life when you have it. I don’t believe in playing to the gallery or trying to impress people but i guess I realised early that things can not always remain the same. This is why every moment is for seizing.

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20th Birthday cake. Chosen by me.

Now that i am out of Uni, it is not likely that i would have the time to think of celebrating let alone gather my friends with as much ease as I could back then. There’s now  work, law school (in view) and other “after school ” things to think about.

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I love Party Props.so don’t blame me please. Zebra print & hot pink theme. Peep the nails!

So , let me breeze through the happenings , themes and plans. For my 19th i had a house party as school had vacated and was to resume the day before my birthday.I stayed back to celebrate though. It was so weird considering that throughout elementary and high school it always fell during the summer holiday. Anyway, I stayed home and had my uni and home friends over. I had a black forest cake. It  was baked by the wonderful Araba’s homemade  bakery and it  said “19 and pristine”. We all played and goofed around. The food was home made and fantastic; fried(basmati) rice, hot dogs,etc. I made punch with my friend Peluwa and my friend Mowale made me up. In the evening my brother-in-law took my family and I out for Chinese dinner at Jade’s Palace or is it Place ? .For my 20th i had about 20 friends over for lunch at a Chinese restaurant ( one of the best in Lagos, lol). Still haven’t seen majority of the photos from that day. lol. For my 21st i had dinner and a Chanel themed “ärray”of cakes.The day fell on a Thursday and i was to have marathon classes. somehow all classes were cancelled a day to the birthday so I had my whole day to myself. This made me happy. My MUA and i created my birthday invites with our computers, lol. they turned out very nice though.  I decided to look a bit like a bride on her wedding reception as I don’t think the look should be restricted to one day alone! My friends who helped with the planning stayed over with me in the hotel we used as the dinner venue. It was a wonderful evening. I was gifted yet another Chanel cake days after by a wonderful friend. I had so many gifts. I still use some till date. Thankfully most were clothes and fragrances. My 22nd i decided to have a playful “nothing serious but yet fun”thing and I thought it was fab. I love cold stone and so i bought props and shared to my friends. There was an ice cream cake, a sparkler, pizza and coke. Lol. It was fun. we had fun like kids. I absolutely loved.

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21st Birthday Cake. “Goodie bag @ 21″theme.

 

 

DSC_0337I particularly thank God that I have never let any guy, that i liked or was seeing , to play a huge role in what happened on any of my birthdays. This is because , take it or leave it, the memory would forever linger. I stand to be corrected but I feel it would be a sort of  feather to his cap even when/if a break up happens. That he did this or that or bought this or that and yet yáll are though like it was nothing to his pocket.I think i am a bit too proud for that pettiness to be attached to something i take as seriously as my birthday. LOL. I have experienced some jerks that would rather you sulked and waited on them to make a move  than have any fun or they would try all the tricks to spoil the birthday mood. Thankfully all my birthdays were never spent waiting on anyone or disappointed by a supposed significant other. I mean if I was in a committed or serious relationship it would have been fine to be expectant to the extent which it is reasonable. I am just  glad I did my self the favour of just doing what i wanted and not “what the boo had dictated (either directly or indirectly )”. To someone like me who believes in celebrating birthdays I would have had it tough and then when I am going down memory lane it would stick out as a bad memory. This does not mean there were not any awesome guys who did wonderful things for me but they just did not take centre stage or even attempt to. 

Girls do celebrate but do not over do  it or try and use birthdays as competition basis. Also be independent enough to plan and execute a fabulous birthday for yourself.

Stay blessed , comment and share…x

 

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Scales… Not The Artist Nor The Fish Feature.

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I have been on this for a month and I realise I cant summarise the feelings a hundred percent. I just can’t.

Disclaimer: if you belong to the fold of women who claim to be feminist but aren’t even sure exactly with feminism entails, then you would be further confused by my post.  I’m here to preach marriage, well not exactly… I’m kidding… Lol!

I believe in equality for both men in women in the work place and in the classroom but I don’t agree that we are exactly the same. Even our physical build bears witness to this fact. This does not justify looking down on women or streamlining their effect or need in the society. It does not mean their only use or value can be in raising kids and running the kitchen. It does not mean the men are exempted from helping out at home every now and then. That is  absolute nonsense and if you’re dating and subtly encouraging the man to be the drone that sits home while you buzz around doing every single thing even changing light bulbs, then shame on you girl. Just to avoid this disclaimer changing the focus of this post, I will continue writing.

The Nigerian society doesn’t appear, to the best of my knowledge, to teach or help the ‘young girl’ to grow into an ‘all-round woman’. Let us take a a girl  from a pampered or not necessarily pampered but privileged background as an example. These  girls are (usually) shipped off to boarding house where they are made to balance chores and school work. They spend roughly 9 out of 12 months of the year in school. Then they graduate and go to Uni (most times very far from home ) and while in uni are told “don’t have boyfriends” “face your books” “don’t press phone” “leave face book”(Lol.. but you just said I should face my books, ha-ha. See what I did there ?).  After this they are to come out with the best grades, gather all the educational qualifications that will pile to the highest heavens and then head back to make the millions. Going by the average age of most masters graduates (26/27) this is the age where the weirdest set of questions now begin to rolling in. “When do you plan to marry” “when would you bring him home” “but the guy that drops you off at home is very nice why won’t you guys tidy things up quickly” I don’t quite get this switch. After being told indirectly that the qualifications and money matter the most, don’t you reckon the focus of the young lady would not be on groomin herself to be a good home maker? where would she even have time to permit being “wooed” ?  At the stage of being done with school , the girl is expected to always love being at home. After being shipped out for over 13 years of schooling ? I didn’t say don’t send your kids to boarding school but please the  expectation switch is not logical. If the child is consistently sent off to be the responsibility of others for so long, when they are due home upon graduation it can’t magically switches. Help them strike a balance

I happen to know two very brilliant women that lived very balanced lives and are married by 26. One happened to date her husband from her first year in uni till they both graduated and decided to ‘tidy things up’ lol. I admire them a lot actually one is a Pharmacist / make-up artist (Adesuwa) and the other is a lawyer /blogger (Katcheetee) .

I think this is where I explain my stand. As a 16 year old I felt the ideal age to start seeing someone would be between 18 -21 ish and then date to marry. I’ve met different guys and girls and life has definitely thrown me its own set of opinions that vary from my ideals but I will forever maintain that I would love to marry at 24. I think when you marry young, you are chanced to know your husband much better. You get to travel the world and live together as a legal (not sneaking around) couple for perhaps a year or two and then have children between 27 and 29. I think by doing this, you are giving yourself the chance to grow old with your kids. I don’t support raising kids when old or at the stage in life when one has attained the position (or the equivalent) of a manager or director at you lace of work. The quality of time and intent would definitely be affected. You find that at this stage most parents are tired, less attentive in the areas that matter the most and probably more permissive. Now I know things don’t always go as planned/desires and ‘man proposes God disposes’. So i’m just speaking from what I regard as the ideal point of view.

Even if I had twenty pages I would probably not pass my message across perfectly. I just think there is no strict formula for balancing love, academics, career and marriage. I hate to hear academics and career take the forefront of importance, only for them to lose their value upon attainment in the absence of marriage and kids. It just makes me think “what does the society want, really” “can it make its mind up already?”  I mean you can’t pick a part of a sermon and preach it, preach the whole thing at once. Do not tell people to study and when that’s all they do you complain they are only book smart but lacking on the home management end or taking too long to get married. Ten when the marriage and kids come the sermon changes to “you ought to be more balanced” “spend time with your family” “clean your house” “your kids are lacking attention they need”. I think this bipolar standard of raising an individual is crappy and is responsible for general imbalance in the lives of many.

 

Balance is one of the key elements in life. There’s nothing more attractive than someone who has their life and the activities in their life organized.  (speaking to myself subtly as well, lol).

Gifting

 

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Gift to self/ Josephine: robe of many colours. Btw, the necklace was a gift I was given sometime last year.

So I have been writing a post on career, marriage and a lot of wrong impressions in the Nigerian society. I will leave that for later  on . Today is on gifts.

Gosh I love gifts. Gifts for others, gifts to self (new things). Last week, 2 older friends and another who is named gift (Ebun in Yoruba) bought me gifts.

When I was in Uni , which by the way I miss terribly, I loved window shopping. Heritage mall was one of the best spots for that. Then, Mr. Price was still open so my roomies/friends and I would go looking before deciding what our purchases would be. This process was super fun. The best part was trying on whatever I had bought once I was back to my room. Shopping wasn’t a habit but it was definitely one of my ways of “gifting me” considering that I regard myself as all that. Lol.

Gifting has always been my thing. My parents have teased me endlessly. My Dad tells me of how, as a six year old, I would ensure I gave a gift no matter how ridiculous, used or old it was. He will probably never drop the story of the time I did not have what to give him and so I broke my pencil in two and wrapped it in paper. I believe this was because in grade, when we still wrote with pencils. Pencils were necessary and important but I had to give something and still have a pencil to use. lol.

As an adult, I have seen this habit evolve. I think there’s absolutely nothing like giving something important, something that would brighten the face of the recipient or something that will remain relevant to its recipient for good. E.g if you know a friend needs a new tube of her favourite lip gloss and perhaps loves to paint her nails, the gloss and an unusual but nice nail polish would do for good random surprise gifts or birthday presents.

I also grew up loving this card shop in London (can’t remember the name now, so annoying) and stop Centre in Lagos. This card shop had and still has the best “all occasion” cards in the world. They had cards to annoy or just be cheeky with, cards for jokes, card for well wishes and condolences. Stop center here in Nigeria (I’m unsure if they’re still as lively s before) had the best cards(mostly Hallmark and Simon Elvis) and gift packaging. O like gift bags, cards and wrapping. I like gift boxes and those gift bags with specific shapes to fit specific items like them wine holding ones. I attack importance to them and I appreciate everyone who has gone through the formality of packaging. I believe it speaks of a superior sense of class. Anyway back to stop center, I remember buying gifts and cards from there getting them packaged for loved ones who had weddings or birthdays. I also remember they made lovely wedding invites. So unsure brides could flip through their samples and select whichever they liked the most.  Pardon my speaking in past/ confused tense. I’m not sure they’re as busy as they were when I was younger. People have dropped the habit of gifting or sending actual cards. I am of the opinion that these things go a long way and have a lasting effect on recipients- even givers. I for one keep my cards ( at least till my mum goes through my room I my absence and trashes what she deems as trash). There’s just a wonderful feeling that comes from knowing a gift is appreciated not only out of politeness but also out of its timeliness/usefulness.

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some gifts from the valentines day gifting service.

I would love to run a proper gifting service. I’ve started one and I pray for grace and resilience to never stop. I think a gift should be useful, timely and match its recipient’s nature. I have given gifts to people all my life and started to help others gift others for a good fee. I ran this service for Valentine’s Day, mother’s day and a couple of birthdays this year. (I’m still running it so feel free to drop an order for an occasion or event or a festive season). Check out my instagram page if you would like to see more gift packages is organized for people.

 

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Gift to self.

Recently I received a bag of mini groceries (2 France deli chocolate chip muffin inclusive)(from the interesting Mr. Chris),a  wonderful baby doll white dress(from sis sunmbo) , Ruby woo and mascara (from Ebun/Gift)!! What makes these gifts very special is the fact that I wasn’t exactly overly expectant of them but i got themm anyway! They were all a surprise. I also gifted myself some wonderful things I got at a souk (a bazaar or Arabian marketplace)  which held in my church on Easter Monday. Two dresses ( one of these got me the name Josephine for being a dress of many colours) and a pair or neon detailed trainers. I have needed trainers for a while and the colour combination of the trainers were perfect. Sumbo was my roomie in my first year in Uni who was in her finals the time. She took me under her wings in such a short time. The second set of gifts  (ruby woo and mascara) I received from a friend name gift. She went to England to speak to a paper she wrote and while discussing her arrival, I had jokingly written her a long list laced with threats and told her to ensure she picked one or two items and brought them back. Lol she actually did and I am elated. I haven’t had mascara in a while (thanks to my long lashes I haven’t needed actually, Lol) I am also running out of Ruby Woo. So she has helped me replace it. Then this morning as I editing this post I get a call from a delivery man that I have a package from sunmbo again. This time it’s a bag full of clothes. I cannot wait to get home and try them all on.

give a gift today. spread the word on christ (an eternal gift) say blessed. xx
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the white baby doll dress in the package it was delivered in. arrived last Friday.

 

 

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the white dress still.

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today’s delivery

No longer a slave

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So, for many Sundays (at least 3 in the last month). This song by Bethel music featuring Jonathan David and Melissa Helser, has been sung by my church choir. So it really is something that it t wasn’t until yesterday that the message in the song really hit me. The words of the song are so simple and yet so powerful. Here are the lyrics…

VERSE 1

You unravel me, with a melody

You surround me with a song

Of deliverance, from my enemies

Till all my fears are gone

CHORUS

I’m no longer a slave to fear

I am a child of God

VERSE 2

From my Mothers womb

You have chosen me

Love has called my name

I’ve been born again, into your family

Your blood flows through my veins

INTERLUDE

BRIDGE

You split the sea, so I could walk right through it

All my fears were drowned in perfect love

You rescued me, so I could stand and sing

I am a child of God.

So the pastor who preached yesterday used the perfect analogy to aid understanding from Mathew 7:11 which says:

If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! (New International Version).

If you’re an only child, a child of caring / responsible parent(s) or you’re a mom , I am sure you understand how parents treat their kids or act towards them. They protect them, provide for them, cradle them, clean up after them, and look out for them and all the works. Then imagine being a child of the one who Is both greater than and is the creator of the parents.

I have been a Christian most of my life. By this I mean it asides being born into a Christian home. I have seen God work in many ways beyond my explanation or imagination so believe me when I say I know God on a personal level. Now, I have made mistakes, sinned and I have been lax (in my relationship with God) in many different ways but without being judged, a simple song’s lyrics made such a powerful impression upon me.  I look back and I realize the times I’ve slipped were the times that I either forgot God is my father, or I depended on another human being for something I really needed or I even trusted myself more than I should have trusted God. Massive error(s)!! I think I worry a lot, to an unhealthy extent.  Going by my faith, the bible and the song, all these are indirectly denying God as my Father.  Think about it like this, how would I claim my father is the richest(Phillipians 4:19), his grace is sufficient for me( 2 Corinthians 12: 9), he has strengthened me to do everything (Phillipians 4:13) , will protect me(Psalm 121:6) and yet still be afraid of catching a boat/flight or financial uncertainties  or be in doubt or even depend a 100% on people?

The part that I would never forget is the fact that I have not walked in full knowledge of being have been rescued from challenges, struggles, habits or strong temptations so I can stand and shamelessly declare in public that I have been saved and I a am a child of God. There’s a saying that goes something like “If you don’t know the purpose of something, abuse is inevitable”.  All this while I’ve known that I’m supposed to spread the gospel and lead an exemplary life but I guess the understanding did not register fully. The word rescue was used in the song. To “rescue” is to completely be saved from a dangerous or difficult situation. Meaning salvation is meant to be a constant maintenance of this status of being rescued so that I can sing to others “see me, I’m a child of God. This means I’m saved from my sickness brokenness, hurt, sadness, loneliness, temptations, etc.”  I’m saved to be an epitome of salvation.

If you’d like a copy of the message preached then please comment below with your email address so I can mail it to you. Feel free to log on to my church’s website http://www.thispresenthouse.org/ and get acquainted or attend any service whenever you can, I assure you your life can not remain the same. 🙂

 

Yoruba Movie ( Lessons ). 101

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Me dressed as a semi-Yoruba semi- Bini princess/Chief priestess.

 

Well it’s no secret that I am interested in the Yoruba language and I am a massive fan of their movies. Massive. I love me some Mercy Aigbe , Madam Saje, and of course the amazing  Odunlade Adekola. Special shout out to Kunle Afolayan for directing ‘October 1’. You should go see it! I will forever spread your good-movie-gospel. Lol. Feel free to Google the names if you are unfamiliar with them.

My friends and family can not quite understand the hype I attach to the movies but hey. “worrevahh” lol. Although I have learnt to start muting the channel once incantations and voodoo chants are being read out or pronounced. I don’t pray my preference for Yoruba movies would expose me to unnecessary spiritual drama. No I’m not superstitious, I’m just realistically aware of the existence of spiritual things.

Now a list of the stuff I have learnt and some movies…

Don’t eat if you’re rich or about to achieve something great.

If you’re rich or there is something happening/about to happen in your life that anyone could be jealous about, they may plan to poison you if you eat! Don’t eat food the server /cook didn’t taste (from your plate) in your presence.

Make sure you are not being watched or you can’t be caught if you’re about to do something silly.

If you want to lace someone’s drink or meal you ensure the door and windows are closed. Someone may be watching. You should leave a portion that you can taste if asked to.

(Watch :Damilola)

Don’t fall for a guy of lower status and attempt cleaning him/ raising his status.

He will leave with your money or stay and spend it all on girls. Sounds funny but please I’m in full support. Love & encourage a man throughout his climb to the top but DO NOT  turn into a charity organization, bank or ATM in the name of love. Don’t.                      (Watch Eja Tutu)

Don’t tell people good news till it can’t be hidden any longer.

If you are expecting don’t announce, even to those near you, till your tummy begins to give you away. If you are likely to be granted a visa or promotion, do not discuss it till it comes through. (Watch: ologbo Iya mi)

Once you get married, don’t step into a hotel again.

If you’re married don’t ever step foot in a hotel without your husband or wife. It means you’re cheating. Yes, even if it the hotel parking lot or reception. Your spouse’s friend/relative will relay the story of your unfaithfulness to them and your marriage could end.

 Record all your interactions

Make a diary of all the interactions you have with everyone even yourself. Anything you say/do can trigger the most unlikely effect in future possibly an “epe”(curse).                           ( Watch: Ipinlese)

If you philander in the days of your youth it will catch up with you.

Don’t break hearts, it will come back to haunt you through a spouse that misbehaves. Don’t even try and molest/harass anyone sexually if not “ti e ma ba e”. Ask your Yoruba friends to translate. (Watch: Iyawo Adugbo).

Don’t walk alone at night.

A word is enough for the wise.

If you’re a director/MD your office is incomplete without a huge dictionary sitting on your desk.  Continue reading

Lights – Camera- Action.

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Photo of a photo. 13 year old me, Brighton beach 2007.

Disclaimer : This is not an attempt to belittle efforts , passion or choices. It is merely an expression of my opinion.

Photography is definitely an art I would have loved to go into. I imagine having being tutored by Ty Bello and investing my creative juices  into the ‘photography sector’ and taking the world by storm.

On a more serious note , I have observed two things which will form the basis of this discussion. The need to document or save memories and the unrealstic set up of occassions these days .

It is fantastic to live life recording memorable moments. Memories are to be made and “regurgitated”. But I have noticed that if you live life obsessed with/driven by the ability or need to document each thing as it pops up or happens, you’d only look back and realise you really did not live life.This  culminates into my second point. It’s a good thing to document the real and necessary stuff. What’s the hype about documenting what’s not real or what did not happen with excessive concerted efforts?

I’m also not a fan of overly rehearsed poses or “fake deep”shenanigans to provoke endless äwws*rolls eyes*.  I look at wedding photographs these days and pre wedding photos and I’m just put off. The need to coordinate poses and locations for best effects , I completely understand but there’s hardly allowance for reality these days. The atmosphere portrayed  in the photographs is so plastic ! you can literally melt the fakeness with a blowtorch if you walked into the dressing room/suite while the shoots were taking place!!!

I am ranting about this particular aspect of photography because if I were chanced, that is  the area I would specialise in. I remember how (back in 2009) I would go on Bella Naija and ogle colour combos , tastefully selected Aso ebi designs ( the literal translation: “cloth of the family”. Ceremonial wears made from matching fabric and are worn by family/ friends of celerant/ couple) , event decor , floral layouts, bridal make up, the moments of laugher between the couple , etc.  I mean who doesn’t love love ? After growing up on Disney stories, lady bird classics and fairytales, my interest should not come as a surprise at all.

Please do not get me wrong, I am actually a sucker for event organisation, planning, creation and smooth execution of event concepts. I also understand the importance of coordinating photo sessions so that all the effort put into planning does not end up wasted or unappreciated due to shabby lay out of photo sessions. BUT I would like to maintain this- I do not share the opinion that unrehearsed moments should be least photographed. Those moments can never be replayed and they matter the most. Life itself is unrehearsed so why so much posing and planning?

Realistically speaking, on the morning of any proper society wedding , there’s most definitely no time for satin robed bridesmaids to pose in robes on a neat hotel bed. neat ? where 10 excited women are prancing around ? LOL. Another thing is the night before the wedding it is almost 100% certain the bridesmaids would not be wearing the same set of pyjamas. So the tussle to get into the same type of clothing , get a photo , get out of the similar wears and then again into another set of similar dresses only to get photographed yet again all before getting to the church or registry leaves me wondering just how real this entire process is. Besides, after much expense to belong on the bridal train , you notice that at the end of the dramatic dance entry into the reception ends with a grand dispersal almost immediately after.At this point I ask myself…

Would I  rally friends round from their different spheres of endeavours, hand them similar clothing to get into a photo/photos with me, get them to wear similar hairstyles/make up/dresses /shoes , only to have them all disperse and not truly share my special moments with me ? I don’t  understand. Maybe we  should all go back to read and understand the concepts behind ‘brides maidism’, before constructing a train and having a wedding. I think it is beyond the records and documentation.

My point is this : What really happens is what matters the most. Did the brides maids over sleep and forget to wake up in good  time? Did the bride knot a towel over her dress to avoid getting stained by make up? Did the brides mom scold her for runing late? Did the grooms men wake up 20minutes to scheduled departure time? Did the Dj forget to include a song on the playlist and everyone sang it instead? The real stuff that would make anyone laugh when they remember is very important and should also be given attention.

 off I go to complete my office work before the day ends. sigh.

The Lady, her date & The bill

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dinner setting at my 21st birthday

so, this is a topic that would catch anyone’s interst. I only wonder how relevant it is nowadays as many people dont go on dates anymore. If ‘dating’ is your thing then you would find this a good read.

I’ve met a couple of ladies who believe in expensive/flashy lifestyles. Thére are those who dont mind the =N=50,000 first date( just so that their story on snapchat would be the object of other ladies envy). I’ve also met others who do not see any reason why they should ever be the one to foot a date bill. Then there are those who are not in the habit of spending on anyone but themselves (lovers inclusive).

P.S, Whatever you opinion or stand is, that is absolutely fine. I am not about to commence a lecture on what your opinion should or should not be. I’m only here to move a motion for “VEX MONEY”.

Based on my understanding, I might be wrong, vex money is what you hold on an outing incase plans change and  you have to foot the bill to avoid embarassment or to even leave the location (independently). To the =N=50,000 first date lady if you can keep up the lifestyle , without going bankrupt, please go right ahead. Just bear in mind not every guy can and even Mr Right may not be able to.He may pretend it has no effect on him and pay inorder to fulfil his ulterior motives.

Before i preach let me make my point, if you can not afford it…DO NOT EAT IT!

I went out on a date sometime last year to a chinese restaurant that had just opened at the time. I had a good time (any time food is involved is a good time to me). Before the bill came my date had to step out and left me his debit card so i could make payments. At that moment, I was very happy that i had mine ,incase anything happened to his or the transaction on his debit card did not go through. As if the POS machine & my senses  had seen my thankfulness, i forgot his password and was left with the options of 1)paying with mine or 2) sitting there with the dirty dishes till he returned. I paid with my  debit card and left to join him where he was outside the building. He refuned later on . Can you imagine if I could not afford it ,or if  I was being ditched or I did not bring my “PLASTIC VEX MONEY”. God forbid.

There’s nothing wrong with taking a guy that you like out and footing the bill every now and then.Please remember you are not his nutritionist , his dietician or his mother. Do not let ‘love’ or the need to prove a silly point  ( to any gold digging sect of underfed people)turn you into any of those things. This is why it is important that you try and strike a balance (by taking him out as well) but ultimately, let yourself be taken care of. There is also nothing wrong with loving fine dining but you can not be so eager to prove a point that you order the most expensive item on the menu or something you are unsure about. what if you have to take a long trip to the powder room mid-meal? please be reasonable and be fair to yourself.

So ladies, please eat your fill but be familiar with your choice, be able to afford it , be considerate and be prepared!

SAY NO TO GREED.